The Misalignment Trap
Heather Maio • February 2, 2021
Part 1....
You cannot become what you are unwilling to be.
A whole sermon in one sentence.
We are energy. We are expanding, burning, and taking in energy all day long. Put us under a microscope, break us down into our smallest parts, and still, we are in motion.
Our cells are literally vibrating; they are so full of life. Like every living thing around us, we are continually shedding and sharing our vibrations with everything we encounter. Good, bad or indifferent, our vibrations effect everything.
Albert Einstein said, everything in life is vibration… and well, who will argue with him?
Vibration, to me, is the energy we are putting out into the world.
Our vibration is our actions and how we respond to the world around us.
It is our energy at work.
A circular statement, I know, but stick with me. I promise I am going somewhere.
For years I believed myself to be powerless.
That I was a victim of my circumstances, rather their creator, and of course, my vibration matched that. My energy was that of a powerless reactor—someone just along for the ride during my time on earth.
While I had big dreams of the things I wanted to do, the person I wanted to be, I could never get ahead.
I was stuck in the lowest of low vibrations. Even when I got ahead, I couldn’t stay ahead. Self-sabotaging was my default: two steps forward, three back. Rinse and repeat for years.
My energy and intentions were not in line with my vibrations.
I wanted to be better, but I was unwilling to DO better. I cannot become what I was unwilling to be.
Even during the forward movement, my actions were not in line with the person I said I wanted to be.
Weight loss is an easy low-hanging fruit, something so many struggles with too, which means it is the perfect example to put this in context.
For years I wanted to lose weight, but I never asked more in-depth questions. Why was weight loss so important, why the constant fixation on my body and its size? I stayed on the surface, which is our default when we are stuck in lower energy.
Looking further isn’t even something that crosses our minds. I know now what I really wanted.
I wanted control. I wanted to be seen. I wanted to feel at home in my skin, and I thought weight loss was the tool to get me to all of those things.
Us women have a tendency to believe all of our problems will be magically solved the second we slip into our skinny jeans or see our goal weight on the scale.
From someone who has experienced both many times, I assure you, it is not the case. We are focusing our energy on the easy work of restricting ourselves, rather then getting clean on the real challenge, finding out exactly what we need and asking why we are holding ourselves back.
While it is true, I wanted to lose weight, I wanted too much more.
I wanted to treat my body with respect and kindness. Get out of the abusive cycle I was stuck in.
I was eating like shit, no care to what was going into my system. I don’t want to put my typical diet here because, truthfully,
it was much like the standard American diet. Some may see it and think, “wait, that is how I eat…”. The last thing I want is for anyone to feel shame around what foods they are putting in their body.
But on the other side of that, what we Americans have deemed a “normal” way to eat is not fucking normal. It is killing us. I felt like shit because of my “normal” diet and knew it needed to change.
But my changes were not aligned with what I truly wanted to be, someone at home in their skin.
Someone who took care of their body and treated it well.
I was way off…
Doing what most do, I drastically lowered my calories and cut out any carbs—the actual furthest thing from treating myself kindly.
I don’t need to tell you how this story goes. I lost weight, I gained weight. I ate super “good” and was the model of discipline, and then when no one was looking, I would drive to the dollar store, by ten buck’s worth of total shit, eat it and throw it up.
So basically, things went great.
I was not willing to be what I wanted to become.
I wanted peace in my body, but I was unwilling to listen to it, to honor it. Instead, I was hell-bent on tuning it out, doing whatever I needed to do to keep myself small and hungry.
I wanted to feel amazing in my skin, but the only movement I did was cardio hours, sweat is fat crying, you know (if you couldn’t tell, I am highly sarcastic).
It took me years to figure out how out of line I was with my actions, and how low I was allowing my energy to be stuck so low by holding onto that bullshit.
My vibration was calling in more shit I didn’t want. My constant complaining was asking for more things to complain about.
I wanted to make more money, but I was horrible with the cash I already had.
I wanted a loving, deep relationship, but I kept myself gaurded and cut off.
I happiness but I was talking shit, gossiping, and otherwise wallowing….
I was not willing to be what I wanted to become.
For years. What I waste of time.
It took years for me to figure out what was happening. It doesn’t have to be that way for anyone else, though.
One fantastic truth I wish I found out about 18 years earlier is;
as soon as you start, you are.
As soon as you make that shift, set your intention to be and do ONE act that follows that intention, you are. That is it. Being what you wish to become is incredibly simple if you allow yourself to get out of your own way.
As soon as you start you are….
Be what you wish to become.
(I am not leaving you hanging…. Look for part two later this week, a “how-to” clean up your vibes.